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5 Secrets To Building Confidence & Self Esteem | How To Be Confident and Love Yourself

Learn How to Be Confident and How to Build Self-Esteem With These 5 Secrets

If you are reading this, you already know how important building confidence and self-esteem is. In fact, it is the infrastructure that will determine what actions you will take. And the actions you take will determine the life you have today and tomorrow. Initially learning how to be confident can seem impossible, but by taking the right actions it becomes quite simple. Even better, once it’s there, it sticks.

Want more money, time, love, happiness or anything else? Improve your confidence and master how to build self-esteem in order to discover that you’ll achieve your goals much faster and easier!

Let’s get into the hacks right now so that you can learn how to be confident today!

#1 Stand and move confidently

Studies have shown that just by standing more confidently, we start thinking in more confident and self-assured manners. My Muay Thai teacher is a professional fighter who has fought MMA around the world and holds a great record. I noticed that he was doing body building poses and posing for the camera when we were filming. At first I wondered why.

Then I realized.

And I started doing the same thing.

I walked with a strut, I did body builder poses, I stuck my chest out, and I moved like I owned the place.

In my videos, I trained much better too. At night or during the day when I went out, others would react to me much differently. I found that I was approached consistently wherever I went.

A great way to do this is to video yourself. Then check out videos from bodybuilders or other confident people on YouTube. Model what they are doing in your own style and see how you look. Keep this same excellent posture and cocky, confident movements all the time (e.g. even when no one is around) so that it becomes an ingrained habit, building confidence in yourself every time you do it.

#2 Make even better eye contact

The more an individual looks you in the eyes with a deep eye contact and attention, the more confident and self-assured they appear. In Brazil, this is a natural trait, and in other places it is one that can be easily learned.

What I have found that works best is to start where it is easy. E.g. start with the sales person in a store or the checkout clerk when getting groceries. Then continue with your friends and family. And when you greet people, for example in the elevator, make eye contact. E.g. you are making it a habit so that regardless of the perceived importance of another person, you continue to make this eye contact.

To go even deeper, you can gaze in their left eye, which some say is the pathway to their soul. You can make great eye contact and in your mind say, “I love you” to transmit even greater positive energy to whoever you meet. And, you can even ask yourself as you gaze in their eyes, “How do they feel? How is their energy? What can I do to make them feel even better?”

In summary, the greater and more steady eye contact, the more confident you will be. Additionally, the more you are focused on giving energy, attention, and what the other needs, you will learn how to build confidence even more.

#3 Speak at an even smoother rate

When I record these videos, which I recommend for you as well to hear and see how you move and speak, I listen to my speaking rate. Sometimes I notice I am speaking too fast. Too fast conveys the feeling of nervousness and a lack of self esteem. Speaking too slow can communicate boredom or lack of confidence in what I’m talking about.

However, there is a medium speed where one comes across as relaxed, centered, happy, with self esteem, and very confident. The best way to identify this is to record yourself in interactions with others, speaking about a topic, or telling a story. Ask yourself or others which sounds the most confident. And then strive to make this speaking pace a habit for a majority of your “normal” communications. Putting this practice into effect regularly will teach you more about how to be confident.

#4 Resonate your voice even more

When an individual is nervous or lacking confidence, a typical reaction is for their body to tense. The muscles in their vocal cords similarly become tighter and their voice sounds thinner and higher pitched. People instinctively interpret this as the person speaking having less confidence and self esteem.

My two favorite activities (which are great as they can be done while doing other things) that can help with building confidence are:

  1. Put your lips together and hum from low to high and high to low
  2. Relax your lips and make the bbbbbbb sound again from low to high

For additional vocal training exercises a great starting point is to look for singing or vocal training in YouTube.

The result of your relaxing and warming up your vocal cords, even for just a few minutes, will be that your voice will resonate even more and you will communicate even greater confidence.

#5 Connect Even More With Infinite Positive Energy

Another awesome way to learn how to be confident is to focus less on yourself and the very fact that you aren’t sure of how to be confident. One of the main reason people feel like they don’t have confidence or low on self esteem is an exterior focus. E.g. they are worried or thinking about what others will think (or not think) of them. This not only blocks the law of attraction from working for them, but gets them in their head. And when they are in their head, they disconnect from the moment, limit their ability to enjoy it or flow.

Others also notice when another is reactive. E.g. if something happens, instead of being a solid confident rock, they are swayed like a flimsy tree in the wind. The main reason for being reactive is because of seeking from other people or situations the positive feelings one wants. Derive your positive feelings more from an infinite source and you will well be on the road to having this solved.

These are the steps to repeat until you continuously are aware of things from your bodily senses, experience the connection with infinite positive energy in the universe, and feel great regardless of what is going on around you.

  1. Relax, become even more present. Progressively relax from your head to your toes. Feel a gentle, loving wave of relaxation flow from your head to your feet and feet to your head.
  2. Visualize yourself as a white glowing light. If you can look at a white object, that can help connect even faster with the whiteness.
  3. Visualize around you a white light.
  4. (Optionally) Allow all that you most desire to FEEL right now to radiate into you on beams of light. You radiate white light even more as you fill with the positive emotions you most desire.

By connecting with the white light representing the infinite positive energy in the universe and optionally feeling more of the positive emotions you most desire, you feel great from an infinite source. It also brings you even more present, quiets your mind, and eliminates or significantly reduces reactiveness. And all these make you be even more confident and self-assured.


To your boosted confidence & self esteem,

Eric Michael


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